Self-Defeating Attitudes Part 2: Three More Tips to Get Your Job Search Moving

by Peter Vogt

MonsterTRAK Career Coach

The first "Self-Defeating Attitudes Will Stop Your Job Search Cold" article drew more reader feedback than any other MonsterTRAK article in recent memory -- and the letters are still coming in.

Most of the comments have been surprisingly positive, given the challenging nature of the article. But several readers offered pointed remarks and "requested" additional attitude-adjustment solutions. So here goes.

Who's Gonna Pay for It?!

In response to the suggestion that job seekers work with a counselor or therapist to conquer self-defeating feelings, Les wrote:

"Really!? Whoa! That sounds like wonderful advice from someone who has a job. ...To seek the help of a counselor or a therapist, the only question I have is: Who is going to pay for that? You? Where do you think the money will come from. �Should I rob a bank?"

There's no need to rob a bank. True, a private therapist may be too expensive when you're under- or unemployed. But if you're a college student or recent grad, there are other options available. You can:

• Work with a counselor or therapist at your school. They are usually free. If you're not a college student, look for a counselor at a nearby community college -- they are often quite inexpensive.
• Religiously affiliated social service agencies such as Catholic Charities, Lutheran Social Services, Jewish Vocational Services and the like serve a diverse, nondenominational clientele. Many of these organizations have policies that prohibit them from turning you away if you're unable to pay. You could also discuss your problems one on one with your own clergy.
• Locate nonprofit agencies in your area that offer vocational or personal counseling services on a sliding-fee scale based on your income. The names and focuses of these organizations vary, but two examples from Minneapolis-St. Paul are the Employment Action Center and WomenVenture. There are probably similar organizations in your area.

Getting Over 'I Deserve�'

Cynthia wrote to say the article "criticizes and gives someone something to think about, but does not offer techniques on how to overcome those feelings." She cited the suggestion that new college grads work hard to lose attitudes of entitlement such as "I went to school for four years and I deserve a good job."

Just how do you do that, Cynthia asks? The secret is to put yourself in the employer's shoes. Try this 30-second visualization exercise:

You're a manager at a small company with 30 employees. You need to fill an entry-level position that's been vacant for three weeks. You have on your desk 147 resumes from recent college grads, most of whom believe their college degree somehow, by itself, sets them apart from every other job seeker.

Which scenario below rings true to you?

Get the picture? When you start seeing things from the employer's perspective, just having a degree and saying "I deserve�" don't cut it.

Think Like an Employer

If you start thinking like an employer, you can overcome another self-defeating attitude: the "why won't employers give me a chance?" refrain. When the manager of that imaginary 30-person company is going through those 147 resumes, which selection criteria below will be used?

You guessed it: "b" again.

Acknowledging these self-defeating attitudes when you look in the mirror isn't easy, and it's even harder to overcome them. But overcome them you must -- one way or another, sooner or later -- if you want to stop damaging your job search prospects and start dazzling employers instead.

© 2008 MonsterTRAK